Boston Marathon, Flowers, and Thoughts on Acceptance

It's bright sunshine here in Boston, MA today and there is a buzz about the city as everyone gets ready for the Boston Marathon on Monday. 1-year ago tragedy struck our city and it launched a time of new perspective for Boston. It's taken me awhile to catch up. Winter is always hard for me no matter how many escapes I take to FL, and this year because of the whole job going-ons it has been especially intense. I think I am coming around the bend.

This journaling workshop has gotten me thinking and writing again. I am not creative in the way many others in the class are. Try as I might with the creative journal I am a word girl. Words and photos. This morning at the market I bought some fresh cut flowers, somehow they made the whole room seem brighter. In another week or so I set up the pots on my porch.

Accepting has been a seemingly persistent theme for me recently. I have been thinking about passive vs active acceptance and acceptance as a good, positive thing, rather than resignation to something. I have been thinking a lot about the yin and yang. How to accept things as they are, without resigning to "that is all I am good enough for". I want to be content in the moment (accepting) with what IS in my life, but not limit myself for the future. As always I wonder if happiness is always elusive because life these days seems so much about self-betterment and always striving for more.

Lots to think about, no answers, it is more of a journey of thought I believe.


Toes 2014

Spring Came
Spring Sprung
Sandals Freed my Feet
And the Sky Shone the Sun


The Little Things I Really Believe In

There are a few things in life that I absolutely believe in. Thanks to Mom and Dad for instilling these in me early in life:

1. Handwritten thank you notes are a must. Please love getting them. They are personal, and leave a lasting impression

2. Always say, Please, and Thank You.

3. Whenever possible without being ridiculously awkward, men should hold doors for women, young folks should hold doors for elders. This isn't sexist or ageist it is just polite.

4. Birthdays should be celebrated, or at a very minimum acknowledged. We are all valuable and important, we deserve a day.

5. The power of a cat or a dog is undeniable. They can calm you, lift your mood, and love you unconditionally.

6. Dark chocolate. Enough said.

7. Napping is not only OK it is luxurious. People who say they aren't nappers? Haven't tried hard enough.


Journal Thoughts

My pens came! So silly but it was great to come home to a fun package.

What are my intentions for Journaling? I don't want to give away course content here as I want it to be special to just our small group (and respect that it is content folks pay for).

Today's thoughts are around Intention.

One of the things Susannah wrote was that for her some of her "most focused writing has happened while sitting 30,000 feet in the air.” Like Susannah, I find that some of my most insightful thoughts happen when I am somewhere other than smack dab in the middle of my normal day to day life. I am heading to Africa on Safari this fall and I expect to have a lot of “clarity” while I sit among nature. What I struggle with is how to live out and act on these realizations once I am back in the land of responsibility, routine, and daily living.

Some other things that hold me back from a truly authentic and open journal writing practice are also similar to what Susannah outlined (it is a bit scary how she KNOWS this): “What if my journal's not pretty enough? What if all I do is moan about how crap my life is? What if I'm making it worse with the moaning? 

“You may read an entry back and cringe at how petulant or naive you sound (I have!).” 

For me, I cringe because I do see the same themes come up over and over again. Finances, not connecting with the right kind of romantic relationships, living my life and making choices based on fear of making the wrong choice or disappointing someone else.

Intentions: What would you like to gain from this practice? Where would you like to find more clarity in your life? What parts of yourself do you wish to reconnect with? Is journalling a way to practice your writing skills, or a tool to facilitate greater self-awareness? Maybe both?

My intention is to reconnect with my current self where I am and project the self I want to be. There is a saying about starting where you are. I’d like to find more clarity around finances and not connecting with the right kind of romantic relationships, and living my life for me, rather than for the approval of others or for the fear of failing. I also want to journal with my Big Dream Journal to dream like a kid again, and have some fun.

quote: arthur ashe


Day 1 - The Tools

I am a bit of a copier. I will admit that. Remember the line in Chasing Amy where the illustrator is accused of being a tracer? Well I am a copier. If someone creative suggests something I copy. Which is how I ended up with these great new “tools” for my new journaling e-course.

Buying these I felt the same thrill I got when I was a kid an my mom said I could get the 64 pack Crayola Crayons with the built in sharpener. Remember that?!

I always have my Moleskin journal, and I have one in bright yellow. I had originally bought it for my Africa Trip this coming fall but I am going to use it now.

For the Dream Journal/Organize my life space I invested in the A5 Finsbury Filofax with removable pages. Yup, the exact same one Susannah recommended. Maybe if I copy her tools I might just get a  touch creative. I have to find my own groove as we go but I want to start with fresh pages, brightly colored fun pens, and a dream of creative journaling ahead.

I wish I could take a workshop in "how to be creative". I get stuck. I get worried I am not good enough. I get hung up on perfection, so I don't try. I have to be bold, I have to try, so I am going to make a go of it in my own private space. No online but in journals. 

So now I have the tools and tomorrow is Day 2.


Journaling MY Life

Journal Your Life

Susannah Conway is one of my all time, long time, favorite blogs to read. Tomorrow I am starting my 2nd e-course with her "Journal Your Life." I don't know if I will write my dreams into reality, but I am hoping it will encourage me to write more, with some depth and clarity, and to possibly get rid of some of the hesitation of putting my words down on paper. I used to have stacks and stacks of journals about every mood I had, every glance a boy gave me, every time I was thrilled or sad, or saw something great. I think at least some of them still exist in a big box in my parents' attic.

I want to do that again.



Bella at "She Told Stories" cued me into the great idea of a Word of the Month. I have tried to do the Word of the Year for several times, and like other New Year's Resolutions it lasts about 3 weeks, maybe a month, and then things change and I need a new word.

A Word a Month is brilliant! Thanks Bella!

As my previous entries can attest to it has been a bit bumpy around here the last three months. So my work for April is Calm.

{credit: jenny's southern comfort}
There are no fewer than 1,000  of these "Keep Calm" posters for everything

For me, I just want to have a month of quiet, and calm. A month where I can retreat and reground myself.

So far, 3 days in I have had a fairly good run. Let's see if I can keep it going for the next 27 days.